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Daukash's avatar

Happy Birthday, Ace. Oddly enough I also moved back to my childhood "home" when I was turning 33. I still sometimes(most times) feel like I don't really belong here, but other times it feels like I never left(in good and bad ways). My friends of old have also moved on without me and living in rural Alabama and not drinking means I have minimal ways to contact with other adults. However, home to me is most often where my wife is. When I change the sheets on the bed or wake up to her scent in the air.... there are a few moments where I feel a little grounded and it makes things okay for a minute.

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ace tilton ratcliff's avatar

what a lovely description of home—scent is such a strong way to evoke memory and ground a person. i've definitely been dealing with the friends of old moving on. you're right that adulthood seems to be so much about drinking. i hope settling in wasn't too difficult!

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Daukash's avatar

It has been ok. Some damage to the body from moving and trying to force myself to be able to work again, but I got past that and now I spend time with my wife and daughter whenever I can and the rest of it is online so it didn't take too much to settle me in. As much as I would wish it was otherwise, the only communities I am a part of are on my computer and on my phone so I never really feel any more disconnected than I do normally regardless of move.

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Clare's avatar

Happy Birthday, Ace! Our friendship has always been in words we type and I’m better for it. Thank you for sharing this beautiful piece. I wish your Home materializes quicker than you think it will.

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ace tilton ratcliff's avatar

thank you, sweet clare! my online friendships are often my most dear, because they continue despite the separation of time and space. thank you for reading this piece <3

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Patrick Sherwood's avatar

Happy Birthday Heather.

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ace tilton ratcliff's avatar

thank you! my name is ace though :) no legal documents with my deadname on it

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Angie's avatar

Happy Birthday 🎉🥂 I live in SoCal and always have. I definitely understand the cost of surviving, especially on SSDI.

I think 'Home' is in your heart and your memories. You carry it with you, wherever you go.

Thank you for sharing your memories, your heart, your home with us!

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ace tilton ratcliff's avatar

thank you! surviving is hard, especially in california. i think that's a really good way to think of Home. thank you for letting me share!

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